Complete Works, 2008-2012.

Wow Bao Beauty (clockwise from left; Lisa
Buscani, Mary Fons, Megan Mercier,
Eliza Burmester, Caitlin Stainken, Jessica Anne)

Our mission this week is to have three sold-out houses. Of course, that's our mission every week, but this week especially so, because it's Caitlin's last week performing Too Much Light Makes The Baby Go Blind before she moves off to parts far, far away, and I think it's fair to say we're all in this state of love and befuddlement and despair about it.

If you've been to the show anytime in the last five years, there's a good chance you've seen at least one of these below plays, and if even one of them changed your life in any way you should come back for your last chance to watch the luminous Ms. Stainken play around in the Neo-Futurist gymnasium.

(Presented alphabetically by year because that's how they've been archived).

2008

2-Minute Ten Dollar Blow Job * 5-Year Letter to Yourself * Barista Tales * Bird Baby * Captain of the Assholes * Copper Uterus * The Diaper Thing * The Distance Between Us * The Evil Hair * Five Reasons Sloths Are Terrifying * Haze the New Girl * How To Score A Temp Job According to the Handout Handed Out By the Temp Agency * Let’s Pretend Mommy and Daddy * I Used to Have a Crush on Your Dad * It Might Be Mayo * Neo-Future Haven’t Finished Faulkner or A Tale Re-Told By An Idiot * Obama Won * Peanuts, Peanuts, Peanuts, Keep Saying Peanuts To Yourself Throughout This Play * People With Your Birthday Don’t Always Have the Same Power Animal As You But You Can Still Be On The Same Page About Some Things, Like Your Birthday * Post-Collegiate Financial Angst  * The Retard Game * Shiny Giny * Someone Was Here Before You * Stations of the Cross #10½: Our Savior Contemplates the Implications of Laying Down His Burden * What I Did Immediately After My First Orgasm * Where I Get Off

2009

All feelings have cycles, but not all cycles have feelings * Al’s Farm. * Back home we used to camp a lot, I miss you and Sara * Can you find the play? * Did you hear about the judges pics? (This is a racial one, so don’t say you heard it from Texas.) * Do you know this person? * Don’t worry, this play will be short. * Half * He doesn’t likes it. * help me self help myself * How I know I’m probably not ready for a baby * Improper Proportions * Insult. Dance. Repeat. * Intermittently Explosive * Lilly White’s party * Loser is the clown * Memories * Message from the yoga mat (Yoga-free) * my house is a small apartment. * No one can come in my box. * The Painted Poop Exhibit: Canis Lupus Familiaris * Pop Artist * Puddin’ Pop * Safety Saver * Sandy Winter * SQUEEZE * Subtexting * This is how my grandmother sneezes * training for love * What women want: A demonstration brought to you by a woman

2010

All for one or one for all? * chin chin * days and dreams * Déjà your dad * Exquisite corpse play * FINE ART BY WHITE WOMEN, ON A WHITE WALL * Greenwashed * Hara Hachi Bu * He swore he’d never see this * I could just fall over * I don’t think my mom would like this play * I miss my Mombo * I want * An Inconclusive Open Letter to Sarah Palin * In the meantime, I guess I have to keep doing stuff to make money * The Longest Play on the Line * A million horrifying Facebook albums of engagement photography and newborns * Mr. Sneaks, silent avenger * Neo Feel In My Box * Neo-Futurist Saying Bee * Neo Sisyphus * A nut breaks through the fourth wall. * Oh, To Be a Kid Again * a one breath poem * ShitStain * Summer Garden, Near Sealy & Sunnyside * untitled ocean * What If? * What just happened? * Wow Bao Beauty

2011

Apartment Living * Better than a drug sniffin dog * Burning Money * Die Fruit Flies, Die!!! * Empathy strikes again * Hold me while I read the news * The Intro Speech (call this number if you don’t know what is happening) * It’s back * It’s Like College. * Make your blind justice jokes here * milky alternatives * Money Money Money * Music sharing time * Next Tuesday November 23 * Nihilism 101 * The Outro Speech (think of this play when the buzzer rings) * The Perfect (Boring Day Job) Crime * A play for Taylor the tech God, with musical suggestions from a tech God of yore * The Right People * Secret Weapons * Sex is Gay * Spooning * thoughts on the supposed next chapter * Trickle down theory  * Who Are All These Douches? * Write this play

2012

2nd Term Election Year Wet Dreams * Blood Brothers By Proxy * Dead Elephants * Death of the Suitcase Play * First Birthday * In and Out of the Woods * In the Chinese-American restaurant in Montana where the only Asian people were eating hamburgers: * Intellectually Speaking * Lay It On the Old Girl * Lolita * Oh No * Recorded, in front of a live audience. * Spencer Kayden told me you got a new girlfriend * Tonight, Brought to You by Tonight * A warm bowl of birds * We Are the 2% * We’re friends.

That's a pretty significant body of work and it doesn't even include all of the plays Caitlin wrote that didn't make it into the show for one reason or another (and many of these plays were good ones).